i heart HP. x
Sunday, July 19, 2009
one of my students told me that she had a nipple fetish
APPROPRIATE!
hahahahahahahahai love my students. they are hilarious.
i spent the entire evening thereafter considering what my particular fetish on the opposite sex is.
.
.
.
.
.
i just realised, (many weeks later) that my favourite body part on the opposite sex is cheekbones and jaw.. i have a thing for sunken cheekbones. oh and expressive eyebrows.
Monday, June 22, 2009
"everyone says i love you" 1996
this movie has my ideal cast. and its a musical. love love love.
goldie hawn, alan alda, woody allen, natalie portman, billy crudup, edward norton, gabby hoffman, natasha lyonne, drew barrymore, julia roberts,
Friday, June 5, 2009
Who makes my dreams? my favourite shoe designers
- sigerson morrison
- sergio rossi
- jimmy choo
- pour la victoire
- terry biviano
- loeffler randall
- peep toe
- camilla skovgaard
- proenza schouler
- katia lombardo
- michael kors
- givenchy
- fendi
- anne demeulemeester
- jpg
- giuseppe zanotti/balmain
- ferragamo
- bally
- steve madden
- chanel
- tods
- christian louboutin
- manolo blahnik
- and more.. please let me know if i forgot anyone crucial but i refuse to put tory burch on here.. she's a hack.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Monday, May 18, 2009
my new career.. i don't know if it exists yet..
i think i have found my calling in life.
i think i want to be a shoe historian.
this is only my thoughts of my last twenty seconds on earth however, i was a history major, i have a massive shoe collection back home and a fondness for shoes which cannot be denied or replaced by the love of a man, and i love antiques..
and then i can claim my purchases as tax deductions! and i can design shoes in my spare time.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
time for another list...
i know you all love a good list.. so here is one inspired by facebook's living social app.
ALL TIME FAVORITE MOVIE CHARACTERS:
- chewbacca
- john mcClain
- han solo
- Alex DeLarge
- Ron Burgundy
- Jules Winnfield
- Tyler Durden
- Michael Corleone
- Tony Montana
- Derek Zoolander
- Indiana Jones
- Kirk Lazarus
- Juno McGuff
- Rizzo
- Peter Venkman
- Forrest Gump
- James Bond
- Ace Ventura
- Jimmy Dugan
- Annie Hall
- Jack Dawson
- Hannibal Lector
- The Joker
- Severus Snape
- Derek Vinyard
- Neo
- Travis Brinkle
- Carl Spackler
- Harry Callahan
- Edward Cullen
- Jack Sparrow
- Andy Stitzer
- Tony Stark
- Optimus Prime
- Falcor
- Borat
- Truman
- Cher Horowitz
- Willy Wonka
- Edward Scissorhands
- Donnie Darko
- Mr. Darcy
- Gandalf
- Danny Ocean
- Dory
- Wolverine
- Austin Powers
- Rocky Balboa
- Amelie Poulain
- Holly Golightly
- Terminator
- Patrick Bateman
- Martin Brody
- Napoleon Dynamite
- Sister Mary Clarence
- the Marquis de Sade
- Donkey
- Olive Hoover
- Clark Griswald
- Lloyd Christmas
- Maverick
- The Bride
- The Scarecrow
- McLovin'
- Mustafa
- Baby
- Marty McFly
- Sebastian (crab)
- Gollum
- CC Bloom
- Jamal Malik
- Inigo Montoya
- Jareth
- Bert from Mary Poppins
- Atticus Finch
- Stiffler
- Richie Tenenbaum
- Nick Naylor
- Jason Bourne
- Remus Lupin
- Westley
- Gretel von Trapp
- Oskar Schindler
- John Bender
- Anton Chigurh
- John Keating
- Billy Costigan
- HAL 9000
- Dracula
- Leeloo
- Lester Burnham
- Teeny
- Troy Bolton
- Jack Torrance
- Noah Calhoun
- Apollo Creed
- Aladdin
- Bridget Jones
- Navin R. Johnson
- Rick Blaine
Sunday, April 26, 2009
foreign exchange
A biracial couple were having an argument and the man insinuated that the woman should be cooking him dinner. She replied, "Hey, I'm not fucking your mother!"
The man, a native English speaker, of course exploded into raucous hoots and hollers.
"Darling I think you mean, "Hey, I'm not your fucking mother", please be careful!"
Moral of the story: the importance of word placement in english conversation.
Also, one of my friends after a hectic night in a game arcade offered to give me a lift and said, "I want to give you pleasure". I hesitated a moment and burst out laughing. The student realised and turned bright red. He then corrected himself, "I want to please you...".. I said, "Mmmm, maybe, it's my pleasure is better".
Moral of the story: Pay attention in class otherwise you will offer a foreign girl your peeps.
An elderly protestant woman is staying in a plush casino in Las Vegas. She gets in an elevator and is followed in by two African American men. The woman presses her floor and one of the men says "Hit the ground (floor)"... The woman preceded to lie down on the floor of the elevator with her hands in the air. The two men crack up into absolute hysterics. It turns out that the men in question were Eddie Murphy and Magic Johnson. The next day, the concierge delivers the woman a bunch of roses... made from hundred dollar bills. True story.
Moral of the story: sometimes your innate racism can make you money. Not a good example.
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